"A Bicyclops Built for Two" is 10th episode in Season 2 of Futurama. It originally aired in North America on March 13, 2000.

Plot[edit | edit source]

Professor Farnsworth brings good news for the crew: after several years of trying, he has finally logged onto the internet via AOL. The Planet Express crew gets into their Net Suits and visits the Internet in a virtual reality simulation. Pursued by predatory flying web-ads, the crew zooms off to safety in a virtual city. There the porn and other enticements induces all of them to peel off singly and in bunches, even Zoidberg, lured by promises of Mackerel on mackerel action!!!

We see an adult chat room populated entirely by lonely, allegedly macho men, along with an undetermined number of actual children posing as men. Leela appears, flexes, calls for a real man to date, and all the 'men' cringe away in horror, squeaking "A woman...!"

Bender pulls up his context menu and changes to "Sexy Nurse," then solicits phone sex calls (for a premium rate). Disgusted by the crew males' visiting the "Filthy Filthy" Chatroom, the women, accompanied by Bender, go into the "Filthy" Chatroom.

Thanks to the Internet, the crew have become bored with sex. All that remains is violence, and everyone indulges their lust for it, playing a full immersion first-person shooter, "Death Factory III, the legend of Death Factory II."

Fry, an accomplished video game player, dispatches all of the crew easily, including a one-eyed man Leela had been excitedly chatting with. Leela is furious that Fry has ruined her one chance to learn who she is.

Later on, Leela Fry and Bender are en route to Cineplex 14 in order to deliver desperately needed popcorn, when Leela receives an email from Alcazar, the one-eyed man she met online, who invites her to his home. Leela dumps the popcorn and changes course to find where she belongs.

Alcazar greets Leela and 'her servants,' and introduces her to the ruined city of Cyclopia. Neaarby is the "Forbidden Valley," where no one must go.

At Alcazar's castle, Alcazar tells Leela the story of what happened to their people. He claims that Leela was sent away as a baby when the blind moles of Subterra 3 launched missiles in every direction, hitting forty planets including Cyclopia. Alcazar had been employed as a pool cleaner and was spared from the chaos while fishing out a dead possum.

Leela decides to help Alcazar save their race and sleeps with him. However, the next morning, a change has come over Alcazar. He now behaves just like Al Bundy of Married With Children, and soon he's gotten Leela dressed like Peggy of the same show. She's even wearing high heels and mincing around like Peggy, and starts calling Alcazar "Al..." in that famous whiny tone.

Much of the remaining dialog for this episode is a series of put downs and cutting replies, in the classic Al/Peggy style.

Despite Leela's earnest efforts to comply with Alcazar's many petty demands, he gratuitously insults her in front of his friends, Pig, Rat Man, and Rat Woman. These "people" seem to be permanently installed on the couch.

Fry doesn't trust Alcazar and attempts to visit the Forbidden Valley, only to fall down a trapdoor and into the dungeon. He tells Leela that Alcazar is a jerk and is hiding something from her. She agrees but she doesn't want to destroy the cyclops race by breaking up with him.

Of course, Alcazar's abuse only gets much much worse, making Leela agree to dump him, then at dinner Alcazar proposes to Leela, and she accepts, despite herself.

Fry manages to escape from the dungeon by himself (somehow). All this time, Bender has been busy stealing the many valuable artifacts from the ruined city and for the first time ever, manages to fill up his chest compartment to overflowing with swag.

Fry urges Bender to help investigate what makes the Forbidden Valley so forbidden, tempting him with the possibility of more stuff to steal. Bender wistfully replies that, "You know, for the first time in my life, I feel like I've stolen enough..."

Fry slaps him back to his senses, and they head for the Forbidden Valley. They discover four identical castles, each more identical than the last and having statues of different aliens.

Before Leela can say, "I do", Fry and the loot-stuffed Bender return with four women, each the last female of their species. Alcazar tries to reason with the women, shapeshifting each time to match their form: the women quickly beat him into submission and he takes his real form, a green insect-like alien.

Alcazar explains that he wanted to make it with five weirdos and have them scrub his five castles, then declares he only did what anyone would do, making Bender almost sob in sympathy.

Further, Alcazar justifies all five weddings on the same day by pointing out how expensive it is to rent a tuxedo that can change shape.

During their return to Earth, Leela sits sadly contemplating her yearning desire to find others of her species, wondering "How many planets could there be?" as she looks out at an infinity of passing stars.

Ongoing Themes[edit | edit source]

In this episode, the crew use their virtual reality equipment for the first time. This time they use it to access the Internet and play online video games. Leela becomes involved with Alcazar and almost marries him, although her relationship with him has little to do with love but more to do with loneliness and a desire to propagate her species. Fry tries to talk Leela out of the relationship, but his motives are pure: rather than just selfishly trying to keep Leela for himself, he sees that Alcazar is bad for Leela and genuinely wants her to be happy.

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